She is in school to be an artistic designer and wants to work for big animation companies. Maybe he’s something like a technical consultant. They walked out the parking lot and went on the school’s quad where all the kids would hang out before school started. She then admits she hasnt told anyone what happened because shes scared of being tested on, which he assures her will happen. He’s sitting in his room, gazing at the stars, when he notices an especially bright one. Like a little kid or an adult) get’s in danger and she saves them. Max and Jace decide to leave but Tyro warns that Malice won’t give up easily and it won’t be long til others learn that the Lexicon is back and that Firerro has a son. In high school i took a class on writing scripts for commercials so thats what i been thinking about going with. For example, if forgiveness vs. revenge is a major theme of the story, perhaps he figures out that the parents probably didn’t actually die in an accident, so he goes to the grandmother and asks to know what happened so that he can (supposedly) forgive whoever is responsible. He doesn’t allow himself to lose control for fear that he may destroy innocent people. PS: I have previously written a comment about how to write a superhero team without making it sound like the X-Men. No. Idk thats how i feel about it. This is where the first episode, section or issue ends A desire to escape from a dull routine?) Sorry for my bad English because I am not a native speaker. It is now up to them to stop their enemy from enslaving other planets, and save the allies they still have. I need some help on how the natural guy power works. That is just one example, and I’m sure there are plenty of other ways that your MC could have a part to play in how she gets her powers. She thought back at Mr. Secoda’s laughter and how he made fun of her, and then suddenly she felt stronger. If a government official let him into their country, the most plausible explanations would be blackmail and bribery, either one of which would be more dramatically promising than everybody involved forgetting basically everything major he’s ever been involved in. His fur was so black it was purple in the light, she imagined it being baby soft, and that he had a croaking meow. When lunch came mostly everybody was talking about the “Incident” that happened to poor Mr. Secoda, girls were whispering in each others ears and guys were saying how cool it was that Mr. Secoda got hurt because they hated him so much. Michael is different from other heroes because he cares about the little things that happen(like when a man steals a ring.) Her character is more in the here and now than anything and she really doesn’t care about her origins. What if he can time travel because of it? He goes with his you g cousin,Josh, on a field trip to a local museum to see the unveiling of an artifact. I just really can’t think of something else that would push her into becoming a vigilante. Everything about the ritual was set up flawlessly, I was going to get what I wanted. I don’t have enough energy to argue with you!”. Then he started his journey around the worl, learning martial arts, learning deductive skills, learning criminal psychology. Labeling him a crazed and deranged teen. Fearing the worst, the heroes prepare for battle, but soon discover that their ancestors, thanks to a last second decision made by Dallas, have been brought back to life. Could it all work in the same story? PS. Mr. Secoda was badly burn, his hand got extremely burnt and his hair burnt away. While looking at robot prototypes. But in other stories, the villain isn’t as obvious and you’re not sure whether to love or hate him. By the way, my e-mail is comicbookguy117-at-yahoo-dot-com. When we last seen our heroes, they were at HQ. … Any feedback would be great. Like comic book readers haven’t seen a spandex hero…. We were both lying down but propping ourselves up with our hands. “Does this thread have an origin story?” If it does, it’s long since been lost to the ages. That said, I think the lack of genre consistency could make this a very difficult sell. The ability to see flashes of her mother’s life strikes me as a bit mystical*. Dear Kate- First of all, I did forget to mention that the organization that does these genetic operations is a corporation I named GenoTech. Haven Rush is a paramedic with hopes of getting into medical school. I’d recommend distinguishing them in ways besides their powers. The story follows two brothers, Connor, 18, and Steven, 22. @B. McKenzie, The guys ate breakfast, went to work out in the personal gym, and then to play some basketball. For example, Internet Explorer and Mozilla have 88% market-share among web-browsers. the good alien dies mortally wondered not before passing on his powers to the unborn child of his former lover (this is the plot for the first story arc regarding the unborn child). ASHTEN: An adrenalin loving combat instructor. She is one of the 5 that are found, but he is quickly disposed of by the enemy. Unwilling teen superhero Each found in perfect condition near the closest precinct of their original residence. It sort of came out of the blue. The plot appears to be more affected by things happening around him (e.g. Editor’s note: I think this is significantly better advice than my original answer. 3) Let’s assume for a moment that Project Vector’s tests go perfectly. This sends other heroes alfter cook and the newly formed team the ‘stangers’. That’ll help clear some things up. I can see why Zane/Xander would not want his help (namely, he blew it once, he’s been out of “active” service for a while and seems to be rusty, AND they might doubt that his heart’s actually in it). The reason i chose the parents is because, the would have been injected to be carriers of the genetic material, that would be passed down to their offspring. few remain as Vexen brings forth an army. okay basically it’s an average zombie apocalypse you know people are dead, world is run over etc etc quite boring really 😛 That first note of conflict, about the person passing all the physical and psychological exams and then becoming insane, helped me iron out a place for one of my already existing, and most treasured, characters. 4. Is the character’s background too exceptional? For example, instead of being just a soldier, your character is a Navy SEAL. “Do more than 10% of their lines focus on his western values? “Now my question is whether it would be offensive or disrespectful to those that lost their lives that day or their families for me to use this in my story?” Umm, understandably, it’s an extremely delicate issue. And that one’s horribly cliched so it got brushed off within three days…, Should I have the computer chip embedded in his cerebral cortex so he can mentally control the suit? However, I think that this is one area in which comic books and superhero novels are different than cartoon shows. I’d like to help, but I can’t understand what you’re asking… could you elaborate? One possibility that might be a bit more promising would be the son gradually realizing the truth and confronting the father rather than the father revealing it to the son. “Don’t leave anything out.”. Rex’s ancestor. Not listening to her, Haven continues to insist that he can be everything she wants, Jess puts a stop to it and says she doesn’t want to see him again, ever. What did he found fascinates him, all of Gretta’s body was transformed into something different than that of a human. Well, I’m off the Internet anyway for the next few hours. the Force in Star Wars). Your story starts in an insane asylum… your target audience knows and appreciates that things will at least occasionally get nuttier than a squirrel in a coffee can. I mean how many types of powers are there in superhero fiction? In doing so he gets in Xander and Zanes way causing the mission to go down and the “essence” released into the city.” I really like this. For an overview it seems really well developed. –“It’s better to be feared within the league of gangs, criminals, and evil scientists; then to be frightened and probably killed by them.” I think this motto could be smoother and probably more original. maybe he lies about not being a mutant to get in the country, and if Japan finds out the truth they can deport him), that introduces deportation as a very high-stakes and credible threat for him to face. … Thus he calls himself download. making the symbiotes characters). Therefore, the OSHA passes the No Work, No Play Act, which states that pretending to be a hero is now a crime. Or will the planet and everything he knows be obliterated?” Thank you for the feedback Brian! JANE: Hero Inventor. The world is 2 times the size of our own filled with many kingdoms and villages. This sentiment is even echoed with his two best friends, Liam and Frankie. School was dismissed early on count of the other “Incident”. He calls the police but he can’t stand idly so he breaks down the door and gets inside. Also yes she fits the anti-hero spot, and here’s a few more notes… I like the conflict shaping up between Marcus (who doesn’t want to be Alvira’s knight) and Alvira (who apparently doesn’t have any other prospects). (school socially split between rich and poor) He and his goons bully a nerd and when things get physical, a one handed push from Kevin sends the nerd into the lockers and alsmost kids him from the impact. I guess I’m more suited to working with abstract things like aliens, this is definitely reflected in my art. – On the ‘Pro Athlete’ angle, I somewhat agree with B. McKenzie. –Are there any non-convict superheroes? The government then kidnapped the best of them and experimented on them. as an attempted murder scene). What are some of the ways he’s different from other superhero protagonists? One thing that I did leave out was that Terry did in fact try to manage on his own but figured that if he stayed by himself he would eventually be overwhelmed and/or it would put his loved ones in harms way. Huxley attempted to called the police but the line on his telephone went off. Why are you meeting your brother at an abandoned bridge?” Tyra asked as she stepped into her car. The villain goes from causing random havoc or minor mischief to betting everything on their new vision. Werewolves, vampires, faeries, leprechauns, wendigos, witches, shapeshifters (were-cats and were-bears), ghosts, zombies, demons, goblins, etc. but I need something more, I just feel like their orgins are still gonna be crap.” The only job of the first draft is to provide a scaffolding for something workable, but it itself doesn’t need to be remotely good at all. Is a dead practice go a few issues before getting to the origin story. * She would ask Anna if she wanted to talk to him but her answer was always the same. Others are unhinged, wilder than a rabid wolf, which forces us to watch their every move. Thank you so much Mr. B McKenzie for your advices and tips. Owen confronts the mysterious psychic as the new White Rhino in a modified padded white wetsuit with a horn protrusion on his forehead manifesting as a stepping stone in the true ability of the white rhino and defeats him the man swears that he will get his revenge and disappears in a flash of red and blue mist, As the new White Rhino Owen becomes the protector of Ironbrook and at his new school strives to become a better scholar and make his sister proud. The Mom’s the hardcase/ strict one in the family. But I think you have something solid here. One day, he was searching for a terrorist as he found a tattoo in a small temple near. One potential concern with Tyro’s backstory is that I fear that his promise to Fierro (to watch over Max) will result in him being uniformly nice to Max. In context, I don’t see any scenarios where he could freely get past immigration without gutting the significance of all of the choices he’s made up to this point. 4) The main character seems pretty passive (e.g. Think of a shark that keeps swimming. I like to know the origin (it doesn’t have to be in the book) and then develop the plot. Meanwhile Ellis, roxanne’s uncle and a scientist who made the chemical mixture attacks the setting (new dawn city) as Octogon with eight mechanical arms that shoot poison darts. Oops it wasn’t erased. missed opportunities to develop character moving forward and make her interesting, and it may also feel too soap opera). “He takes a Lion/animal-like stance.” I’m pretty sure I remember you’re working on a comic book, right? She struggles to make friends because she is a little eccentric, likes heavy metal, wears lots of black and she starts at a more conservative type college. So just brain-storming a bit here. … Sorry He’s a little short-sighted. Her dad forbid it, because of her young age (she was 13 at the time). I have been a little busy with school and haven’t gotten around to posting my idea of Ethan White’s Origins. now I feel like that will not be enough. Ideally, he was doing something most other protagonists wouldn’t have chosen to do in the same circumstances. Nicole said to Lisa a little bit freaked out. In Brazil, he is poisoned by a locust and passes out in a jungle. Awesome! He has a big red sword which seems to have dragon scales on it. however Zombies are known as UnDead for a reason, they are not technically dead, not technically alive either and as a result this messes up with Death’s great list. Should he have some sort of short-range telekinesis or what? Those that have returned absorb the energy of those that were not so fortunate and gain powers proportional to the life lost. most beginners start off with level 1-3, but the aura surrounding the Candor’s uncanny hunting skills gives Jackson a high-level mission. The two also share a personal connection through Osborn’s son and, more importantly, they are moral foils. Armory or armorous his comic is set in the aftermath of NightAngels comic, the demon hunters have set up demon energy seekers, and have set up checkpoints for people to be checked for demon energy, Armory or Armorous gets his powers when a demon poseses his body to get away from being killed from the demon hunters, at one of the checkpoints the demon hunters get a high energy rating from tom (the name i might give my character) they try to kill him, so he runs and his powers from the demon help him escape. Then the patients perform a series of physical and psychological examinations by highly trained professionals…but I can’t decide if it would better if these professional were inside the organization or are hired from outside. Your second note of conflict is good, about the first generation of human that had been altered being insane or unworthy of such power, but I don’t see it working in my world at least in part. You know, just to show that it’s all connected. So, what do you mean is my motivation idea can work if it is executed properly? I guess I can bring in other heroes and villains as he story progresses and the world as become more established and developed. Become unhinged a bit but also want to still help others, struggling with selfishness and selflessness. She greeted back. Good job! truth is I’m kinda bored with it. I misread that. The main character is Jason Blayze. I mean Its Not Really superhero. chose the name of Time Frame , Tanner chose the name of Awesome TM , D.J. For example, a used copy of Deadhouse: Life in the Coroner’s Office is selling for 36 cents + shipping on Amazon. She then encourages Elton to wage up a revolt for the people of their damaged empire. When they arrived, Sam said, “Hey guys, but I’m sorry to tell y’all have a crisis on y’alls hands, apparently the criminals are forming an alliance called the Night Runners. Yes, Demonic forces are indeed trying to kill him. Thanks!… I was also thinking about making it a particular race.. I’d go with that.. Thanks…, I came up with a sort of sensual super woman with a less sensual background. She has a pretty rock relationship with her parents and avoids being in the limelight as much as them. He doesn’t think much of it. Because their cover is a modeling agency (or whatever) they have to make the gadgets and costume look stylish. 3.I’d suggest a more coherent conflict between them and their adversaries than a gangster randomly showing up and killing them and then randomly moving to America. If I could offer a tragedy that might be less sensitive, could I suggest the Challenger explosion? “What do you think class? A group of ancient protectors, survivors of a long ago war, notice that the decendents of their comrads are vanishing at a startling rate. I also have idea for latter stories of a Team of demons in the demon world known as the New Guardians who have been fighting Vexens Hand to bring peace back to the world. the guys he’s fostering with in the U.S… I’m guessing that he’s regarded in the foster system as a special case (after the big accident). Is it his choice? I want my Main Character to be a deliquent, that gets in way over his head when he tries to race a member of an infamous gang. Perhaps the company starts by launching one vessel (with the villain aboard?) People pay them to for the procedures they undergo physical and psychological examinations by highly trained professions…but I can’t decide if it would better if these professional were inside the organization or are hired from the outside. After foster care he wound up on the streets of Prince George BC small City big crime rate, along highway sixteen, known as the highway of tears, (seriously both actually exist).

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